When Brian was just a little past his second birthday, he received his first spectrum diagnosis of PDD-NOS (Pervasive Developmental Disorder- Not Otherwise Specified). The woman who diagnosed him with this told me that she would’ve given him a full-out diagnosis of autism if he didn’t have such a strong connection to me.
Throughout the evaluation, he was hugging me, loving on me, patting my cheek, making eye contact. But that didn’t mean he didn’t have autism.
Autism is a spectrum. There are some kids that may not show such a physical connection to their parents (though I’m willing to bet they have a deep connection regardless). And then there are some that need to be in their parent’s shadow all day long. And they can all be on the spectrum.
My boy and I have always been connected, or attached as I like to say.
We extensively breastfed, we co-slept forever, and every single day there are hours of cuddling involved. He holds my hand by choice every day and he knows what I’m feeling even when I don’t think I’m showcasing it that much. I get met with a loud “MOM” and a big hug every day after school. And a day of school doesn’t go by where he doesn’t ask for me long before it is time to leave school.
And I have to say that I’m so thankful for that.
When so many little pieces are missing or in the wrong place, I am so extremely grateful for the connection that Brian and I have.