So, this happened.
Yup, it happened.
I can’t stop grinning from ear to ear.
And you know why this is perfect and it’s going to work?
Because he already loves my boy with autism.
Sure, it means so much that he loves me and I love him and I can be myself around him and he loves my quirks and he buys me flowers and we finish each other’s sentences and we laugh over the same stupid jokes and we like to complain about the same things and I feel safe in his arms and we like to dance in the middle of the day in the middle of the living room….
But so many marriages struggle when autism comes aboard. Many don’t, but many do. My theory is that when people get married they don’t look at each other and ask, “What if our child has a major special need? What if we will always be our child’s legal guardian? What if….”
And then they’re blindsided and maybe just not ready to cope with that- or to cope with it together. They realize their coping mechanisms are very different. Or they realize they have very different views on how to raise a child with special needs….I don’t know….
All I do know is that I already know Colin is a great role model for both of my children, including my one with autism. I already know he will listen to me talk about biomedical approaches and not undermine me. I already know that he’ll have the patience of a saint. I already know he’ll protect my boy as his own. I already know that he’ll freaking clean up the bathroom after one of Brian’s mishaps…
because he’s already doing it.
We’ve already had the talk about the possibility of my child living with us indefinitely if the need arises. We’ve already talked about future children and how there may be a higher probability that that child may have their own challenges. He tells me how much he will love that child no matter what. I already know he’ll love and go to bat for that future child because he does it for my two already.
And that’s how I know.
That this is right. And this is forever.
I am one lucky lady.